I’m at the age where the first thing I do when I get somewhere is look for a place to sit.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Anything can be a dating app if you aren’t a coward.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Still writing the old year on all my ransom notes.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Farting, but with eye contact.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

Me, seeing a man proposing to a woman in public: Hey, this guy bothering you?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.