Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

You can always tell when a man’s mustache is performative and not representative of his true spirit.

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If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

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My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

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That awkward moment your mom is doing the dishes and you slowly put your dish in the sink.

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Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

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My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

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Even worse than the buzzing of the mosquitoes is the moment when it suddenly stops.

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I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

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If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

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Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?