After you’ve been married a long time, you become able to communicate nonverbally. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s why we never speak.

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Delightful if true: booby trap.

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Rich people go to parties. It’s what they do, and somehow we must all watch videos of it.

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Why are they called “grammar Nazis” and not “the Gestypo”?

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Sure I collect antiques, if you count the late-century spices in my pantry.

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Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

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I was actually doing so well until your email found me.

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It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

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Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

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Everyone hates drama, yet somehow the tabloids remain in business.

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I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.