Killing with kindness is a murder by compliments.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

My new diet plan is to hibernate and live off all this fat I’ve accumulated.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

The bad news is there was a lot of turbulence on my flight this morning. The good news is my phone counted it as steps.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

His hands wouldn’t stop talking to me, your honor.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

The Sims fulfills the millennial fantasy of being able to afford a house in a walkable neighborhood on the salary of a professional carrot peeler.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Some 100 private jets will fly to Venice for Jeff Bezos’ wedding, and I recycle yoghurt cup lids.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.