All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

I can cope well with most situations. Hearing someone smack is not one of them.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Hey bro, please stop using all the good skipping rocks at the river.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Shark tooth necklaces are the perfect accessory if you want to look tough but also tell the world, “I’ve been to a gift shop.”