The rumors of my will to live have been greatly exaggerated.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

For a long time, I didn’t know what to do with my strange thoughts. Then I signed up for Facebook.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Stop roasting yourself, you’re not a marshmallow.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

God’s plan for me is super weird so far.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Mount Rushmore would be way more American if all the presidents were eating.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Gonna vibe recklessly and call it “character development”

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

She didn’t leave you on read, bro. You left her on speechless.