Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, living within your means is so last season 💁‍♀️ Who needs a budget when you have an imagination bursting with creative ways to spend money you don't have? 💸✨ Someone pass the glitter, we're about to DIY our way to financial freedom! 🌈✂️ #ImaginationsUnite"

advice, creativity, financial, financial advice, humor, imagination, lifestyle, means, wit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

1 month ago

again, alcohol, humor, liver, nightlife, party, pay, poor, regrets, tonight, week, wrong
Trying to squeeze in more nothingness today, but my schedule is already packed with procrastination!

5 months ago

humor, laziness, management, nothingness, procrastination, schedule, squeeze, time, time management, today, trying
I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

1 month ago

craving, decision, food, fridge, heart, humor, humorist, i, led, me, procrastination, snack
My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

2 weeks ago

communication, dead, distraction, face, hear, humor, i, listening, said, sarcasm, stare, superpower, talking, while, word
Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

4 months ago

1, am, blackout, blackout curtain, confusion, curtain, curtains, dangerous, daytime, here, humor, indoor, night, outside, sleep, time
I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

1 month ago

back, belief, believe, clock, forgetfulness, forgot, funny situation, God, going, guys, hour, humor, i, next, next hour, oh, situation, stuff, surprise, time, turn

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I have been nothing but creepy and aggressive to you. Please respond.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

Going viral on Reddit:

Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

Just shared via WeChat:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Trending via Telegram:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

Just landed via Twitch:

I like how people say “travel safely” like I’m the one flying the plane.

Seen just now on Slack:

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

Trending via Telegram:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

Trying to squeeze in more nothingness today, but my schedule is already packed with procrastination!

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Hulk Hogan’s gone, so I’ll be ripping shirts and screaming “BROTHERRR!” at strangers in his honor.

A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

No matter how sad you are, there is some form of potato that can make it better.

A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

Moving houses/apartments gotta be top 3 worst human experiences.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

They should invent a day where I feel normal.

Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

The older I get, the more I understand why witches lived alone in the woods.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

Trying to squeeze in more nothingness today, but my schedule is already packed with procrastination!

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏