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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

My life is constantly oscillating between “must save money” and “you only live once”.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

The only men you can trust is ramen.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I went for an interview at IKEA. The manager greeted me by saying “come in, make a seat”.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I wish religion made people nicer to each other.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,560

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

Going viral on YouTube:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Spotted on WeChat:

My favorite thing to do at the gym is stay home and eat a piece of cake.

Trending via Snapchat:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Shared recently on Messenger:

A girl hating you is a million times better than her calling you a ‘nice guy’.

Spotted on Discord:

When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Shared recently on Slack:

Living in your parent’s house is free because you pay with your soul.

Going viral on Threads:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

Funny quote about Britney Spears humorously working at an ice-cream shop called 'Scoops, I Did It Again.'
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, looks like Britney is serving up more than just hit singles at Scoops! 🎤🍦 Who knew she had a knack for mixing up tasty treats along with catchy tunes? "Oops, she scooped it again!" 😂👩🏼‍🎤

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Threads this month:

In the American Bible, Eve was made from part of a McRib.

47 shares on WeChat this month:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

Girls are perverts when they like you.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

76 shares on Threads this month:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

71 shares on Facebook this month:

Time machine? You mean a clock?

60 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m having a bad day. Please send super-cute pics of your credit cards to cheer me up.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Unlike men, women would immediately admit their mistakes if they had any.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being the forward-thinking person I am, I kept my winter fat through the summer.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

That friend who asks too many personal questions? He’s not concerned. He’s collecting.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Female dragonflies will fake their own deaths to avoid mating with unwanted males. They are like, “Ugh, here comes Carl again. Play dead, girl!“

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I see 1000 girls. I know 100 girls. I talk to 10 girls. I love 1 girl. And she doesn’t love me back.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,448

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Yes, I make bad decisions when I’m drunk. But I wouldn’t say that the decisions I make when I’m sober are any better.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Bought a house plant so I wouldn’t be the only one dying of dehydration around here.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Started the year single. Ending the year single. Consistency is key.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.

Just shared via Telegram:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Going bananas on Messenger:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Going viral on Facebook:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Just shared via YouTube:

Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Going viral on Pinterest:

New year update: losing everything but weight.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I know it’s traditional to start work at 9, but I think we could lower that age to 8.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’ve learned my lesson so many times that I could be a teacher.

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