Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I thought Game of Thrones was a pooping contest for men.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

You know you’re really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I wish I had a friend like me.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

Shared recently on TikTok:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

Going viral on Reddit:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Shared recently on YouTube:

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

Spotted on Threads:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

Shared recently on Discord:

The thing I’ve always found tricky about money is knowing how much I should have.

Broadcasted on Discord:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Shared recently on X:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Just shared via Messenger:

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Don’t be sad, laundry, nobody’s doing me either.

Playful quote about laundry and loneliness with a humorous, lighthearted vibe.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Cheer up, laundry! Looks like we've found your kindred spirit in this quote. 🧺😆 No worries, you're not alone in being avoided! #LaundryBuddies"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on Discord this month:

The place where you pour in the gas is the car’s gasshole.

85 shares on Pinterest this month:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

51 shares on Slack this month:

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

73 shares on X this month:

Imagine giving someone your heart at Christmas, but the very next day they give it away. Haha, would feel so stupid.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

98 shares on X this month:

It’s funny how it’s often easier to access academic resources illegally, even when you have university library access.

31 shares on Facebook this month:

Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

41 shares on YouTube this month:

Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when I see a really beautiful car, and I look inside, and it’s a beautiful woman. That’s fire.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Driving behind a salt truck on a snowy day is a Midwest police escort.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,417

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Did you guys hear about the “internet”? Apparently, you can say literally anything there.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

It’s so rude how many of you have the audacity to be out peopling around whenever I go somewhere.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

I love sleeping. You don’t spend any money and you don’t miss anyone.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

My soulmate probably seen my posts and deleted me.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Going out with 38% battery and no boyfriend.

Trending via Messenger:

Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

Seen just now on TikTok:

This December is not Decembering like the other Decembers Decembered.

Trending via Facebook:

My brain has too many tabs open and one of them is playing music I can’t find.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Dear nurses, you don’t have to announce my weight, just write it down. That’s why I have my eyes closed when I’m on the scale.

Just landed via Threads:

If being hard on yourself worked, it would have worked by now!

Just landed via TikTok:

Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Keep posting, I’m diagnosing you.

Freshly posted on X:

Will mosquitoes ever develop a pizza obsession and end their pursuit of human blood?

Trending via Facebook:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

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