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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Sorry about all the mean stuff I said when I was right.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I don’t like talking to people with an IQ lower than the room temperature.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

The mattress in the guest room was perfectly fine until I had to sleep on it once.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

Good friends don’t let their friends do stupid things alone.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

790 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,952

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,952

17 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

I can’t believe someone ran over my neighbors loud motorcycle tomorrow morning.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

Spotted on Twitch:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Just shared via Slack:

It sure is strange that after Tuesday the rest of the week spells WTF.

Seen just now on TikTok:

They say dress for the job you want, so I walk around dressed like Darth Vader.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Seen just now on Facebook:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Spotted on Threads:

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

Reported on WhatsApp:

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they are not robots.

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

6 months ago

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the humble water tower – the silent overlord of town nomenclature! 🏰💧 It's like they're just daring you to forget their existence by plastering the town's name in giant letters, towering above all else. 😄 Next time you drive through a small town, remember to give a nod to the unsung hero, the water tower, without whom the town would just be… well, unnamed! 🚗🌆"

after, ever, humor, irony, names, naming, notice, observation, place, place names, tower, town, water, water tower

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

790 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,952

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,952

17 minutes ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one-night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I’m sorry I didn’t text you back. I’m really busy watching the The Lord of The Rings in the form of mini clips on TikTok.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Every time a Taco Bell rings, an angel gets diarrhea.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

At my age, getting up early just means that I had to go pee, and I couldn’t hold it anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Please don’t be mean to me, because I can be meaner and I hate being mean.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Day 12 without chocolate: Lost all hearing in my left eye.

Making waves on Threads:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Live now on YouTube:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Just landed via WeChat:

A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn’t change anything but it can’t hurt.

Just landed via TikTok:

The woman that cleaned my house could make a lot of money by threatening to release the before and after photos.

Going viral on TikTok:

I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

Live now on Twitch:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m gonna build a pirate ship and sail the high seas. Who’s coming with?

Trending via Pinterest:

I need you to put the fun in refund!

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