77 Funny absurdity quotes

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

When the executioner asks me what my final words are, I’m just going to start filibustering.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Feb 24, 2025

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Chuck Norris passed his driving test on foot.

Funny Quotes Feb 24, 2025

What if babies had two umbilical cords and if you cut the wrong one, it exploded?

What if babies had two umbilical cords and if you cut the wrong one, it exploded?

Funny Quotes Feb 20, 2025

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

I will die on this hill or any hill really. I have no hill preference.

Funny Quotes Feb 13, 2025

Menstruation is bizarre. It's like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

The void screams into me.

The void screams into me.

Funny Quotes Feb 7, 2025

Family guy is so insane, because why were people dating that dog?

Family guy is so insane, because why were people dating that dog?

Funny Quotes Feb 3, 2025

Why are fish the only thing you can monger? Let me monger some other stuff.

Why are fish the only thing you can monger? Let me monger some other stuff.

Funny Quotes Feb 2, 2025