100 Funny after quotes

• 

  3 days ago

  Share →: Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone needs GPS to find their personal bubble! 🚀😄"

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

  Commentary:
  "Life hack: turn productivity into a game of 'How many tasks can I fake complete today? 😎✍️✨ #DopamineOverdose"

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.

  Commentary:
  "Spent 6 hours in a serious 'think tank' only to realize I was just fishing in a puddle! 🧠🤔🐟😂"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

  Commentary:
  "Mind blown! Next you'll tell me you can actually sleep in your bed and not just check if it's still there. 😲✈️🤣"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

  Commentary:
  "Pro tip: Use the 'delay shipping' option on words! 🚚💨🤭"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

  Commentary:
  "Guess he's dunking on sin now! 🙏🏀 #HolyHighJump"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

  Commentary:
  "Lesson learned: Always pre-check before the wreck! 🕵️‍♂️💥🚗😅 #Oops"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

  Commentary:
  "Memory of a goldfish in training! 🐠 P.S. If you see my keys, remind them who I am! 🔑😂"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

  Commentary:
  "When you give yourself the 'never again' pep talk… only for future you to say 'hold my drink' 😂🙈🍻"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic 'verbal time bomb' strategy! 😂💣 Good thing my pillow is a certified therapist! 🛌🧠"

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