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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I dunno how to flirt but I can insult you so nicely.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I really miss my family… sized bag of crisps.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

834 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,996

Funny Quotes Topics

13,938

Funny Quotes Images

10,996

9 minutes ago

3,423

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m not starting a presentation with “ladies and gentlemen”, I’m using the gender neutral “to those who heed my warnings”.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

Going viral on Telegram:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Just landed via TikTok:

This meeting could have been an AI summary.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Seen just now on Messenger:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I told my psychiatrist I’ve been hearing voices lately. He told me I don’t have a psychiatrist.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Just shared via Discord:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Home » Funny Agreement Quotes

Funny agreement quotes

Funny agreement quotes bring a smile 😄 to everyday deals and decisions! Whether it’s sealing a pact 🤝 or just nodding along, these witty lines add humor 😂 to the art of agreeing. Perfect for lightening the mood and sparking laughter 🎉, they remind us that sometimes saying yes can be hilarious. Get ready to chuckle and relate with some clever takes on agreement vibes! 🎈✨

New funny agreement quotes 👇

2 weeks ago
Share →: I’m thinking stuff like “yeah” and also stuff like “yup.”

Commentary:
"Ah, the profound thoughts of a great philosopher: 'Yeah' and 'Yup' 😂🧠💭 #DeepThoughts"
6 months ago
Share →: I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

Commentary:
"Mastering the art of nodding and smiling like a pro! 💁‍♂️😂 Who knew that the secret to peace and quiet was simply nodding along? 🤐🤣 #AgreeToDisagree"
6 months ago
Share →: Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Commentary:
"Mrs. Doubtfire: the OG stealthy custody hacker! 🤫🎬 Who needs lawyers when you have a wig and a Scottish accent, am I right? 😉 #CustodyGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

Commentary:
🤭 Whoops, that moment when your casual agreement turns into a surprise mission impossible! Just like saying "sure, I'll just climb Mount Everest in my lunch break, no problem" and then reality hits like a ton of bricks! 🏔️😅 #UnderestimatedMyself
6 months ago
Share →: At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

Commentary:
"Finally, a common ground between the sexes: the sweet, sweet liberation of unclipping that torture device! 🙌 Say goodbye to underwire woes and hello to a world of freedom! 😂👙 #FreeTheTatas"
6 months ago
Share →: A wise man once said: “Yes, darling. You’re right.”

Commentary:
Ah, the timeless wisdom of acknowledging when the partner is right! 🤣👏 Let's hear it for the wise man who knows that sometimes, saying "Yes, darling. You're right." is the greatest form of wisdom and diplomacy! 😄👍
6 months ago
Share →: Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic echo chamber squad! 🙉🙊🙈 Time to shake things up and introduce a little variety into the mix – let's see how the consensus shifts when faced with a different tune! 🎶💬"

For even more funny agreement quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny agreement quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

834 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,996

Funny Quotes Topics

13,938

Funny Quotes Images

10,996

9 minutes ago

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

Being excited to get in bed really is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

No one told me adulthood would require this much multi-factor authentication.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Being sleepy all day is just part of who I am.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Trending via Messenger:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Spotted on Discord:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Going viral on Messenger:

According to the smoke alarm, the food is ready.

Making waves on TikTok:

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

Just landed via Threads:

I changed my Facebook name to “Benefits.” Now, when people add me, it says, “You are now friends with benefits.”

Spotted on YouTube:

Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee.

Just landed via YouTube:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Spotted on Telegram:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

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