Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: If I was pregnant and people asked when I was due, I would say “What do you mean?”

Commentary:
"Ah, the timeless art of keeping people on their toes! 🤰😂 Who needs a due date when you can keep them guessing, right? 🤔 #ExpectingConfusion"
6 months ago
Share →: Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my train wreck of a life.

Commentary:
🎭😅 "When your therapist needs a therapist, it's a sign that you've truly reached expert level in the game of life! Defeating the final boss therapist with your train wreck of a life? That's some next-level strategy right there! 🏆💥 #LifeGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

Commentary:
Looks like you've been put on the spot with that request! 🎶 Maybe… you should diversify your musical repertoire to keep the peace at home 🤭 Or maybe not! It's always fun to serenade your loved ones with a timeless classic like Wonderwall! 😄🎸
6 months ago
Share →: I’ve just told my doctor I have all the Monkey Pox symptoms. He asked me to swing by tomorrow.

Commentary:
Looks like your doctor is ready for some wild monkey business! 🐒 Just swing on by and show him your best monkey impression! Who knew healthcare could be this entertaining? 🤣 #MonkeyingAround
6 months ago
Share →: I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Commentary:
Looks like there's a bit of magic and mischief in the air! 🧝‍♂️✨ Who knew believing in trolls and elves could come with a side of skepticism? Maybe he just needs more convincing spells and proof from the enchanted forest! 🌿😄 #MagicAndSkepticism
6 months ago
Share →: I forgot the word “espresso” so I asked the barista for a smaller, angrier coffee.

Commentary:
"Who needs 'espresso' when you can simply ask for a tiny cup of fury ☕😡 Sometimes you just need a sip of attitude to kickstart your day! 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: The difference between coffee and your opinion is that I asked for coffee.

Commentary:
Ah, the beautiful simplicity of asking for coffee and receiving coffee – no room for unwanted opinions to sneak in! ☕😄 Just remember, coffee is always welcomed, but opinions… not so much! 🤭☕
6 months ago
Share →: Today my coworker asked if I wanted to hold her new baby and neither of us were prepared for me saying why?

Commentary:
"Sounds like the element of surprise was working overtime in the office today! 🤪🤷‍♂️ 'Why hold the baby' – a hard-hitting question that left everyone speechless and giggling. Sometimes, it's best to just roll with the unexpected and embrace the comedic chaos! 😂👶 #OfficeAntics"
6 months ago
Share →: In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Commentary:
Looks like the boss is taking the phrase "silence is golden" a bit too seriously! 🤫 Who knew increasing morale could involve reducing communication? 🤔 Maybe they're trying out a new approach to team building – the power of awkward silence! 🙊 Just remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder… or in this case, the office grow quieter! 🤣
6 months ago
Share →: My plumber asked me for a Google review. I said I thought it was a really good search engine and I’d give it 8/10.

Commentary:
"Looks like the plumber's not the only one who's good with pipes! 🚰🔧 Giving Google a run for its money, one review at a time! 😄👍 #PlumbingHumor #GoogleReviewRating"