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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Everyone’s a gangster until it’s time to pronounce Worcestershire Sauce.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Good news: I only ate one slice of pizza. Bad news: I did that four times in a row.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s a good thing Titanic is only a movie. A lot of people would’ve died.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Just blocked a guy for accusing me of being “all talk”. On Twitter.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Sorry I’m late, traffic is exactly how it’s been every day for the past couple years, and I was not expecting that.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,448

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

The problem with relationships these days is you don’t know if you’re the one being cheated on, or cheated with.

Just landed via TikTok:

I love when someone texts “hey,” like I’m supposed to solve the rest.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Stereotypes are like mass graves. They’re both offensive ways to lump groups of people together.

Just shared via WeChat:

My superpower? Staying calm when talking to idiots.

Shared recently on Slack:

If you show her you care, she will keep you as a spare.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My body can’t handle the stress of loving anyone romantically, ever.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Getting to the age where I’m like, “Oh, hopefully I’ll be dead by then.”

Just shared via Slack:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Spotted on Discord:

“You’re always sleeping,” God forbid a woman wants to be unconscious.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

221 Funny awkward quotes

Funny awkward quotes shine a light on those cringey, uncomfortable moments we all know too well! 😅🫣 Whether it’s saying “you too” to the waiter who told you to enjoy your meal, or waving back at someone who wasn’t waving at you, these quotes prove that awkwardness is just life’s way of keeping things entertaining. Embrace the cringe and laugh it off! 😂🙃💬

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All funny awkward quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Facebook this month:

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

85 shares on Instagram this month:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

43 shares on X this month:

I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

60 shares on YouTube this month:

I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

25 shares on Discord this month:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

49 shares on Instagram this month:

If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

When I was a kid there were two sure ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s kinda weird that in order to go to sleep you have to pretend like you are already sleeping.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I identify as Michael Jackson, so my pronouns are “he/hee.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

For me, math class is like watching a foreign movie without subtitles.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate this time of year because all you guys care about is football, and no one wants to ogle my cleavage anymore.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Just waiting for my laundry to be done so I can pop it in the dryer and forget about it again.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Diet Coke so crisp I moaned.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Give yourself time to heal. A couple of decades should do it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,298

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

$20k in my bank account. – The k is silent.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Every millennial is now paying Apple $9.99/month for 2TB just to not delete their life.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

There are two types of people: those who are clueless about their kids’ schedules and the other who plan it down to the minute. And they end up marrying each other.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

Drugs don’t ruin lives. Drug tests do.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

People should come with warning labels.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Making waves on Telegram:

I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

Just landed via TikTok:

Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Next month is May. May all the money come to me.

Just shared via Discord:

There are two types of people: Those who steal food off your plate and those who you keep in your life.

Trending via Discord:

Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just water.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

My immune system told me it’s a lover not a fighter.

Trending via Telegram:

If you sit down to play a game of chess and your opponent punches you in the face, you’re not going to prevail by getting better at chess.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

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