12 Funny bullshit quotes

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  1 week ago

  Share →: 70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

  Commentary:
  I'm trading my life preserver for a shovel because it's getting deep in here! 🤿🦺💩

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the age-old battle between authenticity and BS – it's like a subtle whisper dueling with a loudspeaker! 🗣️🤫 Let's be real, why whisper when you can shout nonsense, right? 🤥 Just remember, it's better to keep it real in the whispers than fake it in the broadcast! 😉🙌 #AuthenticWhispersVsBSBroadcasts

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I love how every website has a “Keep me signed in on this computer” button and it’s just straight up bullshit.

  Commentary:
  🤣 "Ah, the infamous 'Keep me signed in' button – a mysterious trap set by websites to test our memory and patience! It's like they're saying, 'Sure, we'll keep you signed in… until you accidentally close the tab or blink too long!' 😂 It's the ultimate test of human reliability in the digital age – a challenge we never seem to conquer! Who needs a personal assistant when we have this ominous button to keep us on our toes, right?

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.

  Commentary:
  "Embracing your inner insanity with elegance – the ultimate survival strategy in the face of life's endless 🐮💩! Who needs sanity when you've got style and a touch of madness? 😜👑 #GracefulInsanity"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: The grass is only greener on the other side because of all the bullshit on it.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, the grass isn't always greener on the other side… it's just fertilized differently! 💩🌱😂"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the devil doesn't like competition, so he messed with your love life instead! 🤷‍♂️💔 Just remember, if the devil's messing with you, you must be doing something right! 😈😂 #LoveTroubles #DevilishMischief

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: “This too shall pass.” And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never f**king ends.

  Commentary:
  "Well, isn't that just life's special way of saying surprise, surprise! 🙃 Just when you think you've got it all figured out, here comes another plot twist ready to stir things up! 🌪️ Hang in there, the merry-go-round of nonsense keeps spinning! 🎠 #LifeIsAJoke"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

  Commentary:
  "When it comes to LinkedIn posts, it seems like some people have mistaken quantity for quality – the longer the post, the deeper it can dive into the realm of BS! 🙈💬 #LinkedInLogic"

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

  Commentary:
  First caveman to see fire: "Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs" 🔥👀 *stomps it out* "and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that." 😂🦴 #NotAFanOfInnovation

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: People who say that they don’t have time for my bullshit should wake up an hour earlier.

  Commentary:
  "Rise and shine, early birds! 🌞⏰ Let's make time for both coffee and a healthy serving of my BS – it's the most important meal of the day! 🤣☕ #MorningBanter"

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