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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

I’m a comedian. My pronouns are ha/ha.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

The highest act of rebellion is to relax unconditionally.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

Making waves on Slack:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Spotted on Snapchat:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Trending via Threads:

When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

Breaking via Discord:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic.

Just landed via TikTok:

When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Seen just now on Twitch:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

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Funny buying power quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,961

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,961

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

Girl who is still crazy: I was crazy back then.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

“Bye, have a great day, I’ll see you after school”, I tell the orange in my kid’s lunch.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

The only reason I insist on returning to the office is because my cat needs a break from me staring at him all day.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Single in the womb, single till the tomb!

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

When you have finished reading this funny quote, you will be a little closer to death than before.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I’ve disappointed better people.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Trending via Facebook:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

Trending via Snapchat:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

Spotted on Messenger:

Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Breaking via Discord:

Do mens sneezes get louder and louder as they age until they explode?

Reported on Snapchat:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Seen just now on X:

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Going viral on Messenger:

Be nice today, the world is on fire.

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