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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

If I had a bf, I’d be a gf.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Family fistfights brought to you by Monopoly.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I’m so sick of these little 30-minute weekends.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

My son put his dish in the sink so I rushed him to urgent care.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Dec 27, 2025

3,956

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

My Uber driver didn’t try to talk to me the entire ride. Five stars.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

One of the weirdest things about being an adult is having a favorite stove top burner. No one ever talks about it, but y’all know it’s true.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I said when I retire, I would travel. I just didn’t expect it to be to the doctors.

Spotted on Reddit:

I hate when I forget to say something during an argument. Like, hey, let’s argue again, I got better material now.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

Going viral on Discord:

I have good problem-solving skills, but my problem-creating skills are where I really shine.

Trending via Slack:

Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Spotted on WeChat:

I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Spotted on Discord:

Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

Home » Funny Career Joke Quotes

Funny career joke quotes

Funny career joke quotes bring a burst of laughter to the daily grind 😂💼 Whether you’re stuck in endless meetings or battling the Monday blues, these witty one-liners and clever quips turn work woes into chuckles 🤣✨ Perfect for sharing with coworkers or brightening up your timeline, get ready to LOL and see the lighter side of your 9-to-5 hustle! 🚀💡 #WorkHumor #CareerLaughs

New funny career joke quotes 👇

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

0

2 months ago

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Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

0

2 months ago

always, archaeology, bone, career, career joke, humor, joke, paleontologist, pick, pun, science, science humor, seems

All funny career joke quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

99 shares on WeChat this month:

If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.

51 shares on Threads this month:

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

52 shares on Discord this month:

I’m never more unattractive than when a bee flies in my face.

96 shares on YouTube this month:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you say “Excellent choice” after somebody selects a floor in an elevator, you can usually get a pity laugh.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

I want to live in a world where the plural of moose is mooses.

77 shares on TikTok this month:

Oh, how much I love a Sunday when you don’t have to work the next day.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone has “Do Not Disturb” on, it’s like, oh, okay, I didn’t realize the great philosopher was in their hour of seclusion. Pardon me for even daring to enter their precious mind palace.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m chronically online in a different and more sophisticated way than you are.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

20 folks are currently checking 👀

No one my age is single because they’re all unhappily married.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My New Year’s resolution will be to stop chasing waterfalls, and stick to the rivers and the lakes that I’m used to.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

This gum has my stomach convinced food is coming.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,898

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

When I was a kid, no phones or tablets. We just read the cereal box at breakfast.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

90% of parenting is wondering when you can lie down again.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

I wish laying in bed all day made me rich.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

All I’m dealing with is broken people. Lord, if I’m a mechanic, please tell me.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

Addicted to eating one gigantic meal a day like a reptile.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I just borrowed some money from a cash app, now I’m about to uninstall it.

Just shared via Slack:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Just landed via Slack:

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

Trending via Pinterest:

If your boyfriend insists he rolls everywhere because it’s ‘faster than walking’, you may be dating a gamer.

Going bananas on Threads:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Of course, because I’m wearing a white shirt, my coffee chose violence.

Trending via Threads:

The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.

Broadcasted on X:

Woke up, twerked in the mirror and laid back down.

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