Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Tuesday is no better than Monday.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

Remember when the most annoying thing about Twitter was trying to think of a shorter word.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

The worst person you know is studying psychology.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Carrying a conversation counts as cardio.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,681

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

It amazes me how many battles in the first two years of the Civil War were decided by which side woke up the earliest.

Breaking via Messenger:

The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.

13 Funny cheat quotes

More funny cheat quotes 👇

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

3 months ago

cheat, humor, plot, plot twist, ta, tax, twist
If your man cheats on you, dump him and date his dad, make him your step son.

3 months ago

cheat, dad, date, dump, humor, irony, man, relationship, son, step, step son
Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

3 months ago

cheat, comedy, crush, dating, flirt, humor, love, me, relationship, trying, unrequited, unrequited love

For even more funny cheat quotes, hit next 👇

All funny cheat quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Santa doesn’t check the naughty list anymore, he just checks social media.

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

Cars should have two horns, one for “excuse me, kind friend,” and another for “curse you and your family for generations.”

97 shares on X this month:

Is this art or trash?

22 shares on Messenger this month:

All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.

16 shares on YouTube this month:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

23 shares on Threads this month:

Job interviewer: “Where do you see yourself in 5 years’ time?” Me: “My greatest strength is that I’m a good listener.”

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

70 shares on Messenger this month:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to hit my 80s & run for Congress.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor got slapped.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

There’s no reason my stomach should be growling, I just gave it some iced coffee.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

The tag on my jeans says “Relaxed” so it obviously doesn’t have children.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

My greatest aspiration is to one day solve a murder on a train.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Drugs do not ruin your career. Drug tests do.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Someone needs to make an app for a Tamagotchi that you keep alive by going offline.

Just landed via Facebook:

For International Women’s Day, I’m going to celebrate by hitting every curb I see.

Just landed via Instagram:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

Just shared via Reddit:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Shared recently on Reddit:

HR is giving me a hard time because I’ve been starting all my work emails with “Dearly Beloved”.

Trending via Slack:

I’m running out of people I like.

Spotted on WeChat:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

13 Funny cheat quotes

More funny cheat quotes 👇

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

If your man cheats on you, dump him and date his dad, make him your step son.

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

All funny cheat quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨