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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to Capri Sun my legs all summer?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Dogs will go through amazing effort to get a better view of your plate.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Sorry I lied when I said “I can’t complain.”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,418

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

“AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

Spotted on Discord:

You’ll never be as lazy as the person who named the fireplace.

Just shared via Telegram:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Trending via Discord:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Making waves on Instagram:

New email opener just dropped: “I am interested in bothering you!”

Seen just now on Telegram:

Not working on myself because I make better content this way.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Just landed via Snapchat:

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

Just landed via Messenger:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Going viral on Twitch:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Home » Funny Daily Task Quotes

Funny daily task quotes

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New Funny Quotes
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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

765 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,927

Funny Quotes Topics

13,899

Funny Quotes Images

10,927

Updated

23 minutes ago

Users Online

3,420

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Don’t be afraid to ask questions during a job interview. It’s the best way to find out if the person you’re interviewing is a good candidate for the job.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Every time I get the urge to clean, I watch Hoarders and I decide my house isn’t that dirty after all.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

I only attract psychopaths. If you’ve ever had a crush on me, find a therapist.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I am brilliantly social for one and a half hours, and then I need to recover in my bedroom cave for two days.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Tidying up usually ends up with you sitting somewhere and playing around with things you found while tidying up.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Just a reminder that with Die Hard, Robin Hood and Love Actually, ‘Alan Rickman ruins Christmas’ is a whole movie subgenre.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Don’t talk to me while my earphones are in, man, I’m at a concert.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Trending via Instagram:

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

Freshly posted on Slack:

You ever see a woman so beautiful it makes you momentarily mentally ill?

Going viral on WeChat:

The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have started asking humans to prove that they are not robots.

Spotted on Slack:

Celebrating President’s Day by not doing anything I promised I would.

Spotted on Twitch:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Just shared via Telegram:

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ve faced more peer pressure to watch certain TV shows than to do drugs.

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