31 Funny dogs quotes

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  4 months ago

  View →: All dogs are therapy dogs. The majority are just freelancing.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Everyone is always talking about raising money for dogs without homes, but what about the ones who don’t have cars?
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  4 months ago

  View →: What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?
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  4 months ago

  View →: People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dog’s chart at the vet says “must be picked up, won’t walk”.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.
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  4 months ago

  View →: Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.
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  4 months ago

  View →: I’m having an orange, and the dogs keep looking at me like, “stop eating that ball, dude.”
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  5 months ago

  View →: You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.
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  5 months ago

  View →: There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.
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  5 months ago

  View →: My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?
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  5 months ago

  View →: Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.
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  5 months ago

  View →: My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.
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  5 months ago

  View →: All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.
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  5 months ago

  View →: If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.
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  5 months ago

  View →: I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
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  5 months ago

  View →: Dogs are man’s best friend because a dog would never blindside you with a group chat.

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