Funny quotes dogs

31 Funny dogs quotes

All dogs are therapy dogs. The majority are just freelancing.

Funny Quotes Feb 10, 2025

I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.

Funny Quotes Feb 4, 2025

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Everyone is always talking about raising money for dogs without homes, but what about the ones who don’t have cars?

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

People are teaching their dogs how to skateboard and my dog’s chart at the vet says “must be picked up, won’t walk”.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Trust my gut? The thing that tricks me into buying gas station sushi and roller dogs? No thanks.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

I’m having an orange, and the dogs keep looking at me like, “stop eating that ball, dude.”

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

All dogs go to heaven, but I never see them in church.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025