Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y'all could do.

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

Commentary:
"Me being my own worst critic: a full-time job with benefits and overtime. Sorry haters, your services are not needed here. 🤷‍♀️🥇 #SelfDeprecationGameStrong"

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Commentary:
"Adulthood is a tricky balancing act – knowing you *could* have cookies for breakfast, but also realizing you wolfed them down last night in a moment of weakness 🍪😂 #adultingtroubles"

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Commentary:
Ah, the joys of appreciating the art of doing nothing as we age, like a fine wine maturing in a barrel! 🍷 Embracing the relaxation game like a seasoned pro. 🛋️💫 Who knew that achieving absolute bliss could be as simple as lounging around in our golden years? 🌟 #DoingNothingGoals

I’ve been doing Dry January, but it’s literally just been my lips and skin.

I’ve been doing Dry January, but it’s literally just been my lips and skin.

Commentary:
🍷💄 When Dry January hits differently… It's all fun and games until you realize your lips and skin are the only ones sticking to the resolution! 😂💋 #DryJanuaryGoneWrong

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

Commentary:
"Remember the good old days when our biggest decision was choosing what snack to eat next? 🍕🎮 Let's all take a moment to honor the lost art of 'productive procrastination' aka chilling at your friend's house, contemplating life's mysteries like 'Should we watch another episode or call it a day?'"

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Commentary:
"Seeking a partner in crime for the ultimate lazy duet! 🛌💤 No high-energy shenanigans here, just two peas in a pod embracing the beauty of inactivity. Who needs hiking when you can have bed rot, right? 😂 #LazyGoals"

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Commentary:
🥁💥 Just drumming away the haters like Phil Collins drums through that iconic drum break in 'In The Air Tonight'! 🥁🎶 Who needs negativity when you've got killer air-drumming skills to show off, right? 😉 Keep rockin' it, and don't let the haters stop your epic solo! 🤘 #DrummingThroughTheDrama

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

Commentary:
"Clearly I'm not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor! 🍷😂 Who needs a sober month when laughter is the best medicine? Cheers to keeping our spirits high and our jokes flowing! 🥂😜 #DrySenseOfHumor"

IKEA products should be cheaper, I'm doing all the work here. It's like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

Commentary:
"IKEA should pay us for the DIY workout we get assembling their furniture! 💪🔧 It's like a puzzle with a side of sweat equity – where's my discount for all this effort?! 🛋️🍳 #DIYstruggles"

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Commentary:
Ah, the exquisite art of productive idleness! 🤹‍♂️ Embracing the Zen master within while also mastering the skill of couch potato-ing. 🥔💤 Who knew that the most fulfilling hobby could be found in the magnificent abyss of nothingness? Time well spent doing… nothing! 🌟 #MasterOfInaction