44 Funny drunk quotes

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

  Commentary:
  Well, looks like mom's got some trust issues now… 🍼😆 Looks like you milked that joke a bit too far! 🥛😂 Hope she lactates some forgiveness soon! 🤣 #WhoopsMom #MamaMilkedIt #GotMomsAttention

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  6 months ago

  Share →: When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the innocence of childhood misconceptions! 🍤🍸 Who wouldn't want a tipsy shrimp cocktail, right? Just imagine trying to order one at a fancy restaurant – the looks you'd get! 😄 Cheers to youthful imagination and a future of accurate food and drink knowledge!"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship?

  Commentary:
  "Ever looked at your ex and wondered, was I drunk the entire relationship? 🍷🤔 Maybe love really is like a fine wine, better with a little buzz 😂🍇 #RelationshipReflections"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

  Commentary:
  "Words of wisdom from the wise Hemingway 🍸: 'Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.' Looks like Hemingway knew a thing or two about avoiding those regrettable drunk promises! 😂👄 #LifeLessons #ThirstyThursday"

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