Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

How did Satoshi write the code of Bitcoin before Claude?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

You don’t scare me. You’re not those two minutes when I can’t find my wallet.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Police officer: please step out of your vehicle. Me: after this song, hold on.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Studies show that 100% of all parents think alcohol tastes much better after spending the day with children.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

You’re in his DMs, I’m outside his window with a JBL speaker streaming Taylor Swift.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, Eat cake.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,359

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

I tell people I rearrange my furniture to change things up, but we all know it’s to annoy my husband.

Breaking via Threads:

Summer is here. Always put on some suncream to help the rain run off.

Just landed via Threads:

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The closest I have ever come to bungee jumping was when I was born.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing beside you right now and you’d have no idea.

Just landed via Slack:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

If I ever go missing, promise me that you won’t put my weight on the poster.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.

Going bananas on WeChat:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Funny family fun quotes

Funny family fun quotes bring laughter and joy to every gathering 🎉👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Whether it’s silly moments at the dinner table or goofy adventures outdoors, these witty lines remind us that family time is the best time 😂❤️ Get ready to smile, laugh out loud, and celebrate the chaos that makes family life unforgettable! 🎈✨

New funny family fun quotes 👇

All funny family fun quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Messenger this month:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

51 shares on Instagram this month:

That moment when you realize “yeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

I need to consult the woods about this.

61 shares on Messenger this month:

First you’re cringe, then you’re the blueprint.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

99 shares on X this month:

I hate when people say “It could be worse” because it could be better, too.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t understand how people use plastic wrap successfully.

74 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t get it when people say they are only a “little” angry, I am either not mad or will kill you.

36 shares on Pinterest this month:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

12 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like smashing my phone would be cathartic.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My cat just sneezed a bunch of times in a row and then hissed at himself. What an icon!

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,631

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Apparently, everyone on the Zoom calls outside my office finds my singing distracting.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

It’s been so long since I had sex last, went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Call me Frankenstein the way I’m piecing it together.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Bugs have so many legs to make up for their lack of personality.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

If you’re wondering how motherhood is going, I’m watching a TV show and someone is in traction with a full body cast and I sighed and said “That looks so relaxing”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Going to all the Halloween parties this year as the Invisible Man.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I’m the type of person to go back to sleep and try to finish a dream.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Using a remote to type on a keyboard on the TV is truly one of the worst human experiences that we endure.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Everybody say a little prayer for my husband, he just told me to calm down.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Seen just now on Discord:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Spotted on Reddit:

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

Trending via Threads:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I love when kids tell me what they want to be when they grow up, because I’m still looking for ideas.

Making waves on YouTube:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Trending via WeChat:

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Making waves on WeChat:

It ain’t easy being America’s sweetheart during these dark times, but someone gotta do it!

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