She doesn't want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

She doesn’t want flowers, she wants to invoke an ancient curse.

Commentary:
Well, we all have our unique gift preferences, right? 💐🔮 Who needs roses when you can summon ancient spirits instead? 🌚 Next time you're shopping for a gift, remember: it's all fun and games until the mummy wakes up! 😂🌹 #AncientCurseGoals

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.

Commentary:
"Who needs flowers when you can have a bouquet of delicious KitKats instead? 🍫🌸 Pro-tip: Chocolate > Petals any day! #SweetToothGoals"

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Commentary:
Ah, her heart is like a haunted floral shop, where ghosts tend to arrangements of wilted blooms, each petal whispering tales of lost love 👻🥀🌿💔🌹.

Ladies, if you receive flowers with no card on them today, they’re from me.

Ladies, if you receive flowers with no card on them today, they’re from me.

Commentary:
🌷💐💌 "Ladies, if you find yourself in a floral mystery today, don't worry – it's just me spreading some anonymous flower power! Who needs a card when the blossoms speak for themselves? 😉"

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

Commentary:
"Oh, they're truly thriving in their natural habitat at the garden center, soaking up all the attention and plant care they deserve 🌺🌿 Who knew the secret to perfect flowers was leaving them where they truly belong?"

Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.

Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.

Commentary:
"Who needs a Fitbit when you have potted plants to track your progress? 🏃‍♀️🪴 Talk about instant gratification gardening! 😆🌱 #BotanicalEnthusiast"

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Commentary:
"Looks like most men have to wait until the very end to enjoy some blooms! 🌼💀 Guess they really nailed their funeral attire with a floral display in the end!"

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

Commentary:
🌹🔵🌻 When it comes to love and flowers, sometimes you need to weed out the surprises! 🪴😄 Who knew gardening could be so sassy and informative at the same time? 💁‍♂️ #FlowerFacts #NotYourAverageRomance