Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I want to be in Metallica, and they will not let me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

The knife is my brush, the jam my paint and the toast my canvas.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Hey, I noticed you’re not saying what I want.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,609

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

Just landed via Twitch:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Going viral on Telegram:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Just shared via Facebook:

Achieving AGI by reducing the intelligence of the average human rather than increasing the intelligence of AI.

Seen just now on Threads:

I drive like I’m immortal.

Spotted on WeChat:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

Going viral on Instagram:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Trending via Pinterest:

It’s so embarrassing when attention seekers feel the need to tell everybody it’s their birthday in, like, every conversation, which, for me, would be today, by the way.

Going bananas on Discord:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

82 Funny happy quotes

Funny happy quotes are the perfect pick-me-up when you’re feeling down 🌞😂! They’re like tiny bundles of joy wrapped in words, ready to sprinkle laughter and positivity into your day 🌈✨. Whether you’re sipping your morning coffee or winding down after a long day, these witty gems will have you giggling and grinning from ear to ear 😄☕. So, dive into a world where humor meets happiness and let the good vibes roll 🌀🎉!

New funny happy quotes 👇

For even more funny happy quotes, hit next 👇

All funny happy quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on YouTube this month:

Some people graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can relate to America, because I too am about to enter a depression.

96 shares on YouTube this month:

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

79 shares on Discord this month:

It turns out when someone asks who your favorite child is, you’re supposed to choose from your own. I know that now.

32 shares on Twitch this month:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

Watching a movie and subtitles not syncing is low-key pain.

28 shares on Telegram this month:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My spirit animal is that one bird that knocks itself unconscious, flying into windows.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not gonna have a bad day. The day is gonna have a bad me.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope you celebrate your birthday like your birth – naked and screaming.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,676

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I apologize to my future son for the delay, but it’s just your mom ain’t replying.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Unfollowing girls on Instagram as soon as they get a boyfriend is something I’ll never stop doing.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

My weight loss journey is just the three hours in between meals.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

If Microsoft Edge is brave enough to ask to be your default browser, you can be brave enough to ask that girl out.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Just landed via Reddit:

Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare.

Freshly posted on X:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Making waves on Instagram:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

Just shared via Messenger:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Trending via Threads:

I don’t think anything good will ever happen again until people feel bad about being stupid again.

Freshly posted on Slack:

The second cup of coffee does for me what a can of spinach does for Popeye.

Spotted on Instagram:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Trending via TikTok:

Note to self: No more bitching about ugly furniture with people at IKEA whose home you haven’t been to yet.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

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