Funny quotes health

172 Funny health quotes

Funny health quotes are a lighthearted way to remind us that wellness doesn’t always have to be so serious! 🏃‍♀️😆 From exercise mishaps to diet struggles, these quotes show that staying healthy can be hilarious too. 😂🍎

Muting morons is good for your health.

Funny Quotes Apr 1, 2025

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

Funny Quotes Mar 31, 2025

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

Funny Quotes Mar 30, 2025

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Funny Quotes Mar 21, 2025

Love is in the air, but so is the flu. Wash your hands!

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I’m addicted to placebos.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Every time we try to eat healthy, along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday, and ruins it for us.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Why is sugar SO addictive, and broccoli is just like, “I’ll be here when you need me”

Funny Quotes Mar 17, 2025

Ask your doctor if it’s right for you to eat oranges and pretend they’re planets and you’re a Greek god.

Funny Quotes Mar 15, 2025

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Funny Quotes Feb 28, 2025

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Funny Quotes Feb 28, 2025

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

Funny Quotes Feb 25, 2025

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

Funny Quotes Feb 24, 2025

I bought my antidepressants off of Temu and now I glow in the dark.

Funny Quotes Feb 18, 2025

Noise cancelling headphones but for when the noises are coming from inside your head.

Funny Quotes Feb 15, 2025

My nutritionist told me wine doesn’t count as a fruit source so now I need to find a different nutritionist.

Funny Quotes Feb 9, 2025

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

Funny Quotes Feb 6, 2025

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Funny Quotes Feb 5, 2025

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

Funny Quotes Feb 5, 2025