236 Funny health quotes

• 

  23 hours ago

  Share →: Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

  Commentary:
  "Dear Brain, if you're on break, I'm gonna need you to clock back in ASAP! 😄🧠🔋"

• 

  1 day ago

  Share →: I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

  Commentary:
  "Apparently grass has no WiFi, but it sure did refresh my glitchy system 🤷‍♂️🚀 #StillAwkward"

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

  Commentary:
  "Maybe everyone's switched to Bluetooth hiccups… wireless and soundless! 🤫😂📡"

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

  Commentary:
  "Seriously, I followed the IT troubleshooting steps: nap taken, brain restarted, headache should be GONE! 😆🤯 #NapFails"

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

  Commentary:
  😂🍹 "This liver's playing hide and seek like a pro! Who knew internal organs could outsmart a drink? Cheers to culinary camouflage!" 🍔🎉

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

  Commentary:
  "Sending positive vibes and bed sheets for everyone's well-being! 😜🛌 #MentalHealthMatters"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Welcome to your fifties. Saturday Night Fever now means lots of rest, cold medicine, and chicken noodle soup.

  Commentary:
  "Saturday Night Fever's new remix: a dance between the couch, the tissue box, and a steamy bowl of soup! 🛋️🤧🍜✨"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Enjoy your 30s, because in your 40s, your first check engine lights come on.

  Commentary:
  "Guess it's time to trade in the sports car for a minivan! 🚗🔧😂 #LifeInThe40s"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

  Commentary:
  "Currently balancing on the tightrope between 'What's happening in the world?' and 'I can't handle the news!' 🤹‍♂️📰🤯"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

  Commentary:
  "Revenge? I prefer to call it 'strategic planning for future laughter.' 😂🗡️🎭"

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