64 Funny hour quotes

• I don’t think I’m allowed to be in public for over an hour.

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  1 week ago

  allowed, anxiety, hour, humor, i, introvert, limit, over, public, social, social anxiety, think, time, time limit

• No, babe, your 10-minute incremental alarms starting a full hour before you actually get up only make me love you more.

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  1 week ago

  actually, alarm, alarm clock, annoyance, babe, before, clock, full, hour, humor, love, me, morning, only, partner, relationship, sarcasm, starting, wake, wake up

• Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

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  1 week ago

  argue, argument, conversation, debate, food, food debate, hi, hotdog, hour, humor, online, sandwich

• I don’t need a maid. I just need someone to tell me once a week that they’re coming to visit, and I’ll panic-clean my entire house in less than an hour.

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  1 week ago

  chores, cleaning, coming, hour, house, humor, i, just, less, maid, me, motivation, need, once, panic-cleaning, procrastination, someone, tell, visit, visitor, week

• The miracle of DoorDash is that I just pick up my phone, punch a few things into it, and within half an hour I have, at my door, a $52 salad.

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  1 week ago

  convenience, delivery, door, DoorDash, food, food delivery, half, hour, humor, i, just, miracle, phone, pick, punch, salad, spending, technology, things

• I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

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  1 week ago

  activity, check, discovery, entertainment, fun, good, half, hour, humor, i, kill, movie, pretty, time

• Lady just asked me what “mansplaining” is. I think it’s a trap. We’ve been staring at each other in silence for half an hour.

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  1 week ago

  asked, awkwardness, communication, conversation, dating, half, hour, humor, i, just, lady, mansplaining, me, misunderstanding, silence, staring, think, trap

• Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them.

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  1 week ago

  ahead, back, competition, dad, driving, family, family trip, hard, hate, hour, humor, last, pass, passing, road, road trip, stopping, trip, vehicle

• Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

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  1 week ago

  48, hour, hours, humor, i, Monday, need, procrastination, ready, should, Sunday, time, weekend

• I invoiced my boss two extra hours for the dream I had about work last night. I’m considering that overtime.

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  1 week ago

  boss, dream, extra, hour, hours, humor, i, invoice, joke, last, management, night, overtime, sleep, time, time management, work

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