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Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Sometimes my toddler throws stuff on the floor and then shouts “OH NO” and that’s kind of like what politicians do.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Oh, gross. I didn’t know there was protein in this powder. I was only drinking it for the lead.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I prayed and accidentally mixed up God and Lord and said Gord. So embarrassing.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

I was explaining to my Ukrainian colleague the phrase ‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch’. She told me the equivalent in Ukrainian is ‘The only free cheese is in the mousetrap’ — which is so much better.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,014

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

I have to stand in the shower about this.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I hate when I finish a show and don’t know what to do with my life.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

Spotted on Discord:

Opening this app is like lighting a cigarette.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

You can recognize working-class kids by the fact that they hang their jacket over the chair in the restaurant and not on the coat hook.

Breaking via Threads:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Spotted on Facebook:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

Live now on Pinterest:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Home » Funny House Shopping Quotes

Funny house shopping quotes

New funny house shopping quotes 👇

Me, having zero balance in my account, viewing houses worth 10 million, and being like, “No, I don’t like the kitchen.”

0

2 months ago

account, aspiration, balance, being, difficulty, envy, expectations, financial, financial difficulty, financial envy, having, house, house shopping, houses, humor, humor about money, i, kitchen, lifestyle, luxury, me, million, money, priorities, property, sarcasm, shopping, unrealistic, unrealistic expectations, worth, zero

All funny house shopping quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on X this month:

Proposing at someone else’s wedding is out. Die at their funeral like a real man.

64 shares on Threads this month:

Some days you just feel like a hotel microwave. You’re here, but you don’t have enough power to actually do anything.

73 shares on X this month:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

51 shares on WeChat this month:

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

96 shares on Threads this month:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t have a favourite person, but I do have a favourite cheese.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

99 shares on Snapchat this month:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

17 shares on Slack this month:

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

The real flex is becoming the woman he cannot run back to.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

God: “You can’t just say ‘Goddammit!’ and expect Me to damn it. There’s a procedure. File the paperwork.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Managed to empty the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something there takes on a life of its own.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Telegram:

“I’m still young”, I tell myself, as my knees make popping noises while standing up.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Breaking via Reddit:

Having a job ruined my life.

Breaking via Messenger:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Going viral on Slack:

I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

Breaking via Instagram:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Shared recently on Instagram:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

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Activity Log ✨

Funny house shopping quotes

New funny house shopping quotes 👇

Me, having zero balance in my account, viewing houses worth 10 million, and being like, “No, I don’t like the kitchen.”

All funny house shopping quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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