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1214 Funny irony quotes

Men make it so easy to hate them.

5 days ago

God, I was so happy when I was 18. I wasn’t at the time, but in retrospect I was.

5 days ago

You only live once and thank God for that.

5 days ago

The human body requires so much maintenance. Who designed this thing?

5 days ago

Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

6 days ago

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

6 days ago

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

1 week ago

All this suffering on earth because someone ate an apple once.

1 week ago

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

1 week ago

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

1 week ago

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

1 week ago

You’ll be fighting for your life financially and that’s when all your toiletries finish at the same time.

1 week ago

Rappers be making you feel guilty for no reason at all: “You was in the house eating dinner while I was in the streets hungry”. Like my fault, bro.

1 week ago

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

1 week ago

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

1 week ago

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

1 week ago

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

1 week ago

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

1 week ago

Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

1 week ago

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

1 week ago

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

1 week ago

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

1 week ago

The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

1 week ago

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

1 week ago

Why can’t my career pursue me instead?

1 week ago

Having a blocked nose really makes you appreciate the finer things in life, like breathing normally.

1 week ago

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

1 week ago

The dumbest people have the loudest opinions on politics.

1 week ago

Imagine hating on me and I’m just in my room also hating on me.

1 week ago

What an embarrassing time to be alive.

1 week ago