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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

God knew I would be too powerful if I had conversation skills.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,374

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

Making waves on YouTube:

Finally gathered all my thoughts and now they’re jumping me.

Going viral on Slack:

I’ve decided to give people an attitude instead of gifts this year.

Spotted on WeChat:

A woman’s way of flirting is thinking about you until you get the urge to reach out to her.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Sometimes life is like a cowshed. You step from one turd into the next.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The quickest way to get your kid to do their homework is to ask them to help with some chores.

Shared recently on X:

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Going viral on Twitch:

Some people get it. Most people don’t.

1657 Funny irony quotes

Funny irony quotes are perfect for those moments when life takes a twist you didn’t see coming — with a wink and a punchline! 🙃🔄 Whether it’s sarcastic truths or perfectly timed contradictions, these quotes capture the delightful absurdity of everyday life. Embrace the irony and get ready to laugh at the unexpected! 😂🌀📚

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Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on Twitch this month:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

16 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My acting reel includes clips of me “listening” during Zoom meetings.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

43 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

27 shares on Slack this month:

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

78 shares on Messenger this month:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

73 shares on Instagram this month:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The place where you pour in the gas is the car’s gasshole.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Where do we acquire the ducks that we’re supposed to be putting in a row?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I hope nobody sees me eating by myself and feels sorry for me. I’m having the time of my life.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t study, get slutty!

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

How can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning?

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry for being socially awkward. It’s just that I’m socially awkward.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t argue anymore. I just agree and let the plot unfold.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,473

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Going to the beach the day after watching Jaws hits different.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I’m trying to cut back on how much sense I make.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

You look like something I drew with my left hand.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

The Face ID on my phone won’t work until it sees the loss of hope in my eyes.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Sorry, I said yippee when you took off your pants. Do you still think I’m hot?

Trending via Facebook:

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

Spotted on TikTok:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I don’t understand why my cooking was garbage. I did everything right. I drank wine while I cooked. I had a hand towel over my shoulder. Literally everything right.

Shared recently on Slack:

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

Trending via Instagram:

Social anxiety so bad I wonder if I’m welcome at places I was invited to.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Having a horse run off on you in medieval times must have been crazy. Imagine if your car got scared and ran away, and you found it a day later by itself at a gas station.

Trending via LinkedIn:

For Halloween, I’m going as an emotional roller coaster.

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