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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

When you first meet a man, that fake version of him be so fire.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Wonder what I should wear to World War III.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… you can now fall asleep sitting up on the couch at any given moment.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,953

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Making waves on WeChat:

Reverse cowgirl because you made me mad, and I can’t even look at you right now.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

“You’re just mad my gut microbiome is way more diverse and complex than yours.”

Just landed via Instagram:

Unfortunately, if you want to end your single life, you have to do something. So that’s not for me.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Still waiting for aliens to abduct me, which feels pretty rude considering I’ve been dressed and ready for years.

Making waves on WeChat:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

Breaking via Messenger:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

Seen just now on X:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

32 Funny online shopping quotes

Funny online shopping quotes are the perfect way to capture those relatable moments when your cart feels like a rollercoaster ride 🎢🛒 From impulse buys to checkout guilt, these witty lines add a sprinkle of humor to every click and scroll 😂💸 Get ready to laugh at the quirks of digital shopping and celebrate the joy of snagging deals without leaving your couch 🛋️✨

New funny online shopping quotes 👇

For even more funny online shopping quotes, hit next 👇

All funny online shopping quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Discord this month:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

55 shares on Threads this month:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

41 shares on TikTok this month:

Phone dry, no food in the house, I keep dying in my game. I’m such a loser.

41 shares on Threads this month:

There’s nothing like the excitement of a brand-new book to add to the massive pile of books I still haven’t read.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

Your child learning to say mommy is when your life begins and ends.

13 shares on WeChat this month:

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

42 shares on Instagram this month:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

74 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Parents may forget many things, but they never forget who brought the noisy toys into the house.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when people find out I meant every word I said.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when lashes make me look evil.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

676 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,997

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Relationship status: the black mold in my shower thinks I’m cute.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

To everyone who opens the fridge, stares, and closes it hoping new snacks will appear… You’re my people.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Being flirted with while you’re on the clock feels like a hostage situation.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

Trending via Snapchat:

If I could do it all over again, I would ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.

Making waves on Reddit:

JFK is the perfect name for this airport because it’s a bloody headache.

Seen just now on Slack:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I want to become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Tell your dog I said woof woof.

Spotted on Messenger:

I was gonna get on the treadmill, but then the couch will get sad.

Just shared via Reddit:

I have no desire to rekindle anything with anyone. See you never.

Trending via Instagram:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Spotted on X:

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

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