Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

Girl, I’m bored. Let’s start drinking the daily recommended 10-15 cups of water.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Imagine hating me, and I’m over here with one hand in my pocket, and the other one giving a high five.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Tinder, but for nearby people that have a printer you can use.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

I have a drawer in my kitchen that I can’t open anymore because of that one time I decided to put a spatula in it.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

20’s: what even is a hangover? 40’s: puts on sunglasses to open fridge…

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,471

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The worst part of a fender bender is having to get out of your car and meet a new person.

Seen just now on Threads:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Just shared via Discord:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Just landed via YouTube:

Some people should have read-only access to the internet.

Trending via Slack:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Spotted on Slack:

Demi Lovato is short for demilitarized love potato.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

Just shared via Twitch:

I need new friends. The old ones know too much.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Getting a wax is wild, like you really just be bust open talking to the lady like it’s nothing.

133 Funny party quotes

Funny party quotes bring a playful twist to the excitement and chaos of celebrations! 🎉😂 From humorous observations about party antics to witty remarks on social gatherings, these quotes capture the joy and hilarity of festive occasions. Enjoy a laugh and celebrate the fun side of partying! 😄🥳

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All funny party quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

Trust me; this is the second millennium I’ve lived in.

84 shares on Reddit this month:

Your opinions are not my business.

55 shares on Instagram this month:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

79 shares on TikTok this month:

First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

24 shares on Messenger this month:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

10 shares on Discord this month:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

68 shares on X this month:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband thinks he can just order me around like he’s one of the cats.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Photos are cool because they are like now but for later.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,505

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

If you want to experience hunger, go and live with a wealthy person or family.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

No plans and no pants kind of day.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I was born in the right generation. I love bedrotting and scrolling through Twitter all day.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Old people be like, “No elbows on the table, it’s rude,” then say something racist.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

I’ve realized there’s more to life than social media, so I guess this is goodbye for the next 12 minutes.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

I liked it better when I was naive enough to think everyone was empathetic.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

What happened to my ankles tonight mosquitologically can never happen again.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Stop checking up on your friends, and check up on me.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m sorry I didn’t text you back. I’m really busy watching the The Lord of The Rings in the form of mini clips on TikTok.

Just shared via Telegram:

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Spreading quickly via X:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Behind every strong, independent woman… is a dog that follows her to the bathroom.

Trending via Instagram:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

Going viral on TikTok:

One day I will start learning from my mistakes. Today is not that day. Tomorrow isn’t looking so good either.

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