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116 Funny playful quotes

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1 month ago
Share →: To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

Commentary:
"Finally, a royal decree I can get behind… or rather, under the covers! 😂👑🛏️ #NobleNaps #RoyallyTuckedIn"
1 month ago
Share →: Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Commentary:
"Breaking news: New gender discovered—Legtacular! 🤣🪑👖"
1 month ago
Share →: I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Commentary:
"Can't wait for our terrifying reunion! 😱😴👻"
1 month ago
Share →: We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

Commentary:
"Looks like we're gonna need a timeshare agreement for the swing pushes! 😆⏳🎡"
1 month ago
Share →: The reason my eyes are dilated is because I am so attracted to you, officer.

Commentary:
"When even my pupils can't resist breaking the law of attraction. 🚔👁️😂"
1 month ago
Share →: She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations.

Commentary:
"Exploring new territories—gastro-ventures and more! 🌍🍽️😏 #BiteAndSeek"
1 month ago
Share →: Babe, would it kill you to meow back?

Commentary:
"Why meow when I can hiss-torically ignore? 🐱😹"
1 month ago
Share →: Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

Commentary:
"Prime numbers must really think they're the Beyonce of math, strutting around like 'Sorry, I'm only divisible by myself and one!' 😂✨ #DivaDigits #Mathsass"
1 month ago
Share →: Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

Commentary:
"Degrees in snackology and sunbathing 101—I'm on the honor roll! ☀️🍿😂"
1 month ago
Share →: Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

Commentary:
"Show those leafy freeloaders who's boss! 🥗💪🌿😂"