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2 months ago
Share →: Taking a phone to school in primary was like smuggling drugs.

Commentary:
"Back then, sneaking in a phone felt like we were on an undercover mission! 🎒📱😎 #SecretAgentVibes"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

My therapist is fluffy and walks on four paws.

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If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Shared recently on X:

Calm down, engine light, if I can run on broken parts, so can you.

Going viral on YouTube:

If I get rid of social media, how will I know what everyone ate for dinner?

Seen just now on Instagram:

There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

Spotted on Slack:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Reported on Snapchat:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I hate listening to a rapper that I used to adore, and they just don’t have it anymore.

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Funny school rule quotes

New funny school rule quotes 👇

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Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Everyone’s gangsta until grandma grabs that wooden spoon.

I’m optimistic, in a pessimistic way.

Tuah Kill a Hawkingbird

At this point, I’m not sure if my house is a mess or my mess is a house.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Nothing is impossible, except for my daughter returning home with the hat and gloves she wore to school this morning.

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

My dream car is a taco truck.

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my casket and throw it in the crowd to see who next.

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

Why does everyone always think that I know what I’m doing? Most of the time I watch myself in amazement and am curious to see what happens.

I have so much planned today that I was already tired thinking of it yesterday.

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

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