I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos? Posted on43 minutes ago
Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow. Posted on3 hours ago
After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles. Posted on3 hours ago
My doctor told me to try a milk bath. Adding the Cinnamon Toast Crunch was my idea. Posted on8 hours ago
I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing. Posted on10 hours ago
It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest. Posted on20 hours ago
Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon. Posted on23 hours ago
If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems. Posted on1 day ago
I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy. Posted on1 day ago
Skinny people are easier to get blown around by storms. These donuts are for my safety. Posted on1 day ago
The closest I’ve come to mastering a martial art is figuring out how to wash my feet in the shower. Posted on2 days ago
I know sacrifice. I’m willing to pluck a few extra hairs to get to the white ones. Posted on3 days ago
Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free? Posted on3 days ago
Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day. Posted on3 days ago
Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am. Posted on4 days ago
My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress. Posted on4 days ago
I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday. Posted on4 days ago
I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful. Posted on4 days ago
Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life. Posted on5 days ago