Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

I let my girl wear whatever because you’re staring, and I’m hittin’ that.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Kinda psycho that there’s a clothing brand called “Banana Republic.”

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

You are the Monday of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Notice how you don’t catch me in public, it’s because i’m not real.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

“Yeah no” is my favorite combo.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I skip questions on exams like I’m gonna be a different person when I come back to them.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

The Secret Service was chasing me but I painted a tunnel on the side of a wall and they all ran into it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

Making waves on X:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Spotted on YouTube:

When does hibernation actually begin? I wanna take part this year.

Going bananas on Twitch:

When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

Going bananas on Discord:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Just landed via Discord:

Being single only sucks when you’re a little drunk and really want to flirt.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Just shared via Reddit:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Just landed via TikTok:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

24 Funny shirt quotes

More funny shirt quotes 👇

Sorry if I seem sad, I got a new long-sleeve shirt for fall, but I haven’t been able to wear it yet because it’s 94°.

3 weeks ago

able, clothing, fall, fashion, frustration, got, heat, hot, hot weather, humor, i, long-sleeve, long-sleeve shirt, mismatch, new, sad, seasonal, seasonal frustration, shirt, sorry, temperature, wear, weather, weather mismatch
Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

3 weeks ago

actually, cleaning, countertop, countertop cleaning, daily, daily routine, face, face washing, feet, feet washing, floor, floor cleaning, forearm, forearm washing, hair, hair washing, hand, hand washing, hands, humor, hygiene, multitasking, routine, shirt, shirt washing, washing
Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

3 weeks ago

bug, came, clothing, crazy, humor, i, insect, material, nature, shirt, silk, thanks
Hulk Hogan’s gone, so I’ll be ripping shirts and screaming “BROTHERRR!” at strangers in his honor.

3 weeks ago

brother, gone, hogan, honor, Hulk, Hulk Hogan, humor, ripping, screaming, shirt, shirt ripping, shirts, stranger, strangers, tribute, wrestling

For even more funny shirt quotes, hit next 👇

All funny shirt quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on YouTube this month:

Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.

84 shares on Reddit this month:

I admire how time manages to quickly heal wounds but takes forever to remove awkward tan lines.

48 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m cosplaying as a functional adult again.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

I keep my mind active by worrying.

26 shares on Snapchat this month:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

25 shares on Telegram this month:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

Not to brag, but I don’t fight with people on the internet.

12 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’ve never completed a marathon, but I’ve listened to my mom tell a story, so don’t talk to me about endurance.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

Am I the only person who would rather almost fall over carrying the shopping than walk a second time?

56 shares on Threads this month:

Brains are awesome. I wish I had one.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

“Yeah no” is my favorite combo.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I’ve added lunges to my workout routine. It’s a big step forward.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Did anyone else use grocery bags as textbook covers, or was I just that poor?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

My husband refused to get glasses. But that was before he brushed his teeth with fake tan.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

AI could never replace me, you can’t put this much self-loathing into a machine.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

Breaking via Facebook:

One day I’ll do amazing things. Today I’ll be satisfied if I don’t spill food on my lap.

Live now on Facebook:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Making waves on X:

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

Just landed via Messenger:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Just shared via Instagram:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad.

Spotted on Slack:

Getting older is sexy. You moan more.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

24 Funny shirt quotes

More funny shirt quotes 👇

Sorry if I seem sad, I got a new long-sleeve shirt for fall, but I haven’t been able to wear it yet because it’s 94°.

Washing your face is actually multitasking because you are also washing your hands and forearms and shirt and countertop and feet and floor and hair.

Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

Hulk Hogan’s gone, so I’ll be ripping shirts and screaming “BROTHERRR!” at strangers in his honor.

All funny shirt quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨