Funny quotes sign

25 Funny sign quotes

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Funny Quotes Mar 18, 2025

Scams used to be like “free money!” and now they’re like “hello, we have a job for you”, which seems to be a bad sign.

Funny Quotes Mar 8, 2025

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Funny Quotes Feb 24, 2025

Every time the universe sends me a sign, I’m like, okay, but I think I’ll wait for a signier sign.

Funny Quotes Jan 28, 2025

I voted for the candidate on the last yard sign I saw before pulling in. Slow children at play will lead us into the future.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Might start signing off emails with ‘well, I hope you’re happy’

Funny Quotes Jan 27, 2025

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Funny Quotes Jan 26, 2025

Where do I sign up to be one of those influencers with 2M followers whose whole thing is just standing in front of other people’s content and nodding?

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

Funny Quotes Jan 25, 2025

Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Funny Quotes Jan 24, 2025

I’m in favor of sticking an “out of order” sign on some people’s foreheads. As a warning.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Funny Quotes Jan 23, 2025

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I sign all anniversary cards with ‘Way to commit to the bit!’

Funny Quotes Jan 22, 2025

I’m a Leo so I just eat the other astrological signs.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Funny Quotes Jan 21, 2025

I’m so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-toe on top of it.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

Funny Quotes Jan 20, 2025