Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Careful, “friend”. One more word about Shakira and you might find out just how fast I can draw this blade.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

My first mistake of my life was my birth.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Females be cheating in healthy relationships, but are faithful in toxic ones.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Hey (with the intention of getting ice cream).

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

That made me feel good. I think I’ll become addicted.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Dec 30, 2025

4,029

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My most boomer belief is that you can often get a malfunctioning appliance to work again by slapping it.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

Just shared via Reddit:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Live now on Twitch:

Caffeine: the adult version of fairy dust.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

Shared recently on Twitch:

At 30+, I’m like an old phone battery. Even when you charge me overnight for 10 hours, by midday I’m at 60%.

Trending via WeChat:

I think my leftovers are old enough to throw themselves away.

13 Funny signal quotes

Funny signal quotes 📶😂 are the perfect way to lighten up those frustrating moments when your Wi-Fi acts up or your phone drops calls 📱💥. Whether you’re stuck buffering or lost in a sea of no bars, these witty lines will have you laughing through the tech troubles 🤣⚡. Get ready to share some giggles and turn signal struggles into pure comedy gold! 🎉📡

New funny signal quotes 👇

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

0

3 weeks ago

barista, called, coffee, coffee shop, feeling, getting, humor, interaction, love, male, me, mixed, mixed signal, nickname, say, shop, signal, signals, today, upset, yesterday
Mixed signals mean they don’t like you like that. It’s that simple.

0

2 months ago

communication, dating, dislike, love, mean, mixed, mixed signal, rejection, relationship, signal, signals, simple
I named my wifi “The Promised LAN” because it always connects, but occasionally leaves you wandering in the desert looking for a better signal.

0

2 months ago

always, better, connectivity, desert, digital, humor, i, internet, joke, looking, occasionally, pun, signal, tech, tech humor, technology, wandering, wifi
Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

0

2 months ago

blinks, driving, free, free trial, here, humor, road, road safety, safety, signal, signals, traffic, trial, turn, turn signal
I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

0

2 months ago

clarity, clear, communication, expectations, humor, i, misunderstanding, mixed, mixed signal, perfectly, relationship, signal, signals, thought
Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

0

2 months ago

authority, convoluted, convoluted language, just, language, legalese, magic, magic spell, power, rhyme, sense, signal, special, spell, spells, term, terms
One thing that could really “level-up” the experience of being a pedestrian would be if cars had some kind of feature that could indicate whether or not they were going to turn in a particular direction.

0

2 months ago

being, cars, direction, driving, experience, feature, going, humor, level-up, pedestrian, road, road safety, safety, signal, thing, turn, turn signal
I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

0

2 months ago

abyss, busy, busy signal, communication, existential, frustration, humor, i, irony, scream, signal, today
Blink if you want me!

0

2 months ago

attraction, blink, communication, date, flirty, humor, me, signal, want
Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

0

2 months ago

body, body signal, brain, digestion, empty, food, humor, hunger, signal, stomach

For even more funny signal quotes, hit next 👇

All funny signal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

49 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

85 shares on X this month:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

73 shares on YouTube this month:

The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

69 shares on YouTube this month:

Basically a lot of my problems boil down to me being really bad at waking up, and also really bad at going to sleep.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

“This too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

12 shares on Reddit this month:

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

79 shares on Telegram this month:

Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked, whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Wishing I could hit snooze on life’s alarm clock!

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The best way to get through Monday is to pretend it’s Tuesday.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Never underestimate my desire at any given moment to go home.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The struggle to get off the couch and into bed is real.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Things I hate about group work: The group.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when my AirPods die instead of me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,772

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Play the Grindr notification noise at Christmas dinner to see which conservative relatives panickedly check their phone ringer.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

My bear’s diarrhea problems are really starting to worry me. The vet says he’s getting better but he’s not out of the woods yet.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Men don’t chew on toothpicks all day anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Born to be a hater, forced to understand your perspective.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I hate when people are outside when I’m trying to parallel park. I need some privacy.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Women are actually very understanding if you’re honest with them, especially if they like you. You don’t even have to do all that lying.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Just landed via YouTube:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m doing pretty good for someone who rarely has a clue.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Who is praying on my downfall right now and can you stop?

Seen just now on Slack:

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

Seen just now on TikTok:

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Just landed via X:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

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