Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I can’t watch Sex and the City anymore, because I get really upset at how much money these ladies have.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

My birth year getting a lil too far on those lil scroll lists. I don’t like that.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Who needs a dominatrix when you can be beaten up by an automatically retracting vacuum cleaner cable?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

I wonder if Van Halen realized they were writing music just to lift weights to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

33 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

Tattoo idea for men: spider webs in the corners of the receding hairline.

Spotted on YouTube:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I have friends in high places (birds).

Breaking via Telegram:

It’s not my job to tell people where they’re failing in life. It’s just a hobby.

Going viral on Facebook:

You never know how strong you are until someone’s story runs more than 5 minutes long.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

Seen just now on Slack:

If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’m lacking vitamin c-ash.

Home » Funny Simplicity Quotes » Page 4

32 Funny simplicity quotes

More funny simplicity quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Commentary:
Alright, let's break it down! 🧒🏻👵🏻

"Okay kiddo, imagine this: you know how you ask for candy and get excited, right? Well, when you're a hundred, it's like having all the candy you want without even asking. Isn't that cool?" 😄🍬

Age is just a number, but the wisdom in between is priceless! 🌟 #KidAtHeart
$Funny simplicity quotes - Girl math is ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.$

6 months ago
Share →: Girl math is ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.

Commentary:
Girl math is like trying to cut a cake with ten thousand spoons 🍰🥄 – talk about an exercise in futility! It's like the universe is playing a cosmic prank on you, leaving you with an arsenal of spoons when all you really wanted was a trusty knife. Oh, what a slice of irony!

For even more funny simplicity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny simplicity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

768 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,930

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,930

33 minutes ago

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

Boy, did The Shining nail what it’s like being an only child.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Super excited about a brand new week of hanging on by a thread.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Don’t worry, guys. Together we can eliminate logic and reason on social media. I see some of you are already ahead of the game. Way to go!

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The key to a healthy relationship is taking turns being the sad one.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Reported on Twitch:

People just don’t build cities on rock and roll anymore.

Trending via WhatsApp:

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Just shared via WeChat:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

Going viral on Twitch:

It’s strange being the same age as old people.

Making waves on Slack:

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴