23 Funny smoking quotes

• If I was a fish, I’d be smoking all the seaweed.

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  3 weeks ago

  fish, humor, i, ID, pun, seaweed, smoking

• Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”

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  4 weeks ago

  daily, daily habit, fine, guy, habit, humor, i, moderation, smoking, think, weed

• I caught two kids smoking pot outside my office. Fifteen minutes later, my boss caught me and two kids smoking pot outside my office.

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  1 month ago

  boss, caught, i, kid, kids, later, me, minutes, office, outside, pot, prank, smoking, smoking pot, workplace

• Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

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  2 months ago

  contradiction, fitness, humor, need, pick, runner, side, smoke, smoking

• Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

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  2 months ago

  addiction, addiction humor, break, break time, breaks, cook, every, gambling, give, hour, humor, i, job, job break, jobs, minutes, only, parlay, should, smoking, time, why, work, work humor

• I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.

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  2 months ago

  addiction, coping, coping mechanism, humor, life, me, mechanism, smoking, stop, stress, weed

• Vaping always looked dumb. It looks like you’re smoking a kazoo, and now the lead poisoning is the cherry on top.

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  2 months ago

  always, cherry, dumb, health, health risk, humor, kazoo, lead, lead poisoning, looks, poisoning, risk, sarcastic, smoking, top, vaping

• If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

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  2 months ago

  12, 1970s, 1980s, 80s, anything, humor, i, keith, Keith Richards, Marlboro, Marlboros, million, resilience, richards, smoking, survival, survive

• Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

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  2 months ago

  cool, feel, feeling, humor, irony, smoking, vaping, want

• I am re-watching “Narcos,” and I have to say that for someone who smokes so much weed, Pablo Escobar gets a lot done.

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  2 months ago

  am, crime, crime show, done, drug, escobar, humor, i, lot, marijuana, motivation, much, Narcos, pablo, Pablo Escobar, productivity, say, show, smoking, someone, weed

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