Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

Commentary:
👮‍♂️🤧 "Ah, the classic 'dad sneeze' lineup – where you don't need an eyewitness, just a good ear for that unmistakable 'Achoo!' in the crowd… Or maybe just follow the trail of dropped dad jokes! 🕵️‍♂️😅"
6 months ago
Share →: If you live in the same hemisphere as me, you’ve probably already heard me sneeze.

Commentary:
"Oh, bless you and your loud sneezes that echo across the hemisphere like a symphony of nasal fanfare! 🤧🌍 Looks like you've got the globe covered with your sneeze game – world domination, one achoo at a time! 😂"

Fun Fact or Trivia:
Did you know that the average person's sneeze travels at a speed of about 100 miles per hour? 🤧💨
6 months ago
Share →: Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Commentary:
"Swipe right if you want to hear my ACHOO-tastic sound bite! 🤧😂 Who needs a pickup line when you've got a sneeze that'll sweep you off your feet? 🌬️💕 #SneezeForLove"
6 months ago
Share →: The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!

Commentary:
Oh, the joys of neighborly interactions! 🤧🗣️ "Bless you" is so overrated, right? Keeping it real with a well-timed "Disgusting!" is the new polite norm. Who needs quiet balconies when you've got sneeze shoutouts instead? 🤣 #NeighborlyEtiquette
6 months ago
Share →: My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

Commentary:
Ah-choo! 😈 Beware my sneezes, for they are so powerful that they could summon demons from the depths of the Middle Ages! 👻 Who knew my nasal exorcism skills were so legendary? 🤧 #SneezeGoals #PossessedByDemons
6 months ago
Share →: I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.

Commentary:
Looks like love is in the air… or maybe just some airborne particles! 💨💍 It seems this sneeze might have blown away any romantic plans for now. 🤧 Let's hope the vow renewal doesn't turn into a "cover your nose and repeat after me" situation! 😉
6 months ago
Share →: Hello pollen, my old friend, my nose is running once again.

Commentary:
"Ah, the annual reunion with pollen, the uninvited guest who always brings tissues 🌼🤧. 'Hello pollen, my old friend, my nose is running once again' – it's like a dreadful holiday tradition! 🤣 #AllergySeasonBlues"
6 months ago
Share →: My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

Commentary:
Ah, the joys of sick-day warfare! 💥 When your body turns into a battlefield and the cough drop becomes the unexpected hero launching across the room like a fearless warrior on a mission. 🚀 Who knew a sneeze could be so dramatic and a cough drop such a daredevil? Watch out, world, you've got a new cruise missile in town, and it's minty fresh! 😂🤧 #SickDayMissions
6 months ago
Share →: Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Commentary:
"Ah-choo! Who needs a pat on the back for that sneeze? 🤧💥 Looks like someone graduated to dad sneeze level! 👨🏻‍🦰👶🏻 Better get ready for some ‘bless you’s’ coming your way! 🤣"
6 months ago
Share →: Do mens sneezes get louder and louder as they age until they explode?

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old existential question about men and their sneezes! 🤔👴🤧 Do we need to start measuring sneeze decibels to predict when the explosion might happen? 📏💥🤯 Stay tuned for the booming conclusion of this sneeze saga! 😂👃 #SneezeVolumeExploding"