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Funny television quotes

New funny television quotes 👇

  • “Grey’s Anatomy” but it’s told entirely through the lens of the hospital’s HR department.

    Commentary:
    “Get ready for ‘Grey’s Anatomy: HR Edition’ where the real drama happens during performance appraisals and interdepartmental conflict resolution. Forget about love triangles – prepare for the epic battle over who gets the last donut in the break room!”

  • I got all my marriage skills from watching Al Bundy.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs relationship advice when you’ve got Al Bundy as your mentor? 🤣👰‍♂️ Don’t forget to rock those white socks with sandals while lounging on the couch! 🧦🛋️ #MarriageGoals”

  • We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

    Commentary:
    🔪💼 “Introducing the latest hit sensation: Downtown Stabby! Watch as crime takes a stab at the ordinary in this cutting-edge series. Warning: may cause sharp laughter and pointed suspense! 🔍🚓”

  • Ever since I learned the show is called Suits because of lawsuits and not because they wear suits, I have harbored a hot white rage within me beyond anything mankind has ever known.

    Commentary:
    “Discovering the true meaning behind ‘Suits’ was a plot twist greater than any legal drama! 🔥😱👔 Who knew the power of a mere title could unleash such fiery emotions? Something tells me this revelation was a lawsuit waiting to happen! ⚖️😂 #MindBlown”

  • Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

    Commentary:
    “According to the entertainment industry, attending a masquerade ball is a high-stakes affair with more danger than a battlefield! 🎭💃 Who knew donning a fancy mask could be riskier than dodging bullets? 🎥😄 #BallroomBattles”

  • Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like Europeans have cracked the code to beating boredom – read, baby, read! 📚📖 Who needs suspenseful TV dramas when you have the entire literary world at your fingertips? Keep turning those pages, Europe!”

  • When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

    Commentary:
    “When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, it’s like receiving a free pass to embark on epic adventures and conquer life’s challenges in the time it takes him to tie his shoelaces! 🦸‍♀️🎨📺 #TimeWellSpent #WifeyPower”

  • I see stand-up comedy as a stepping stone to television. A few more paid gigs and I’ll be able to afford a television.

    Commentary:
    🎤 “I see stand-up comedy as a stepping stone to television. A few more paid gigs and I’ll be able to afford a television.” 📺

    Well, they do say laughter is the best medicine, but hey, who needs healthcare when you can just get a TV instead? 😄 Looks like this comedian is setting their sights on a bigger screen – talk show host in the making, perhaps? 🌟 Never underestimate the power of a good punchline and a remote

  • The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

    Commentary:
    “Oops, looks like those intense finales really made a TV disappear faster than a magician’s trick! 📺🧙‍♂️ Maybe next time, stick with a soothing soap opera for a gentler viewing experience! 😉”

  • The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

    Commentary:
    “Ah, The History Channel: where ancient aliens are our unsung heroes and conspiracy theories are served with a side of bizarre enlightenment! 👽🛸 Who needs textbooks when you have extraterrestrial intervention to thank for everything, right? 😉 #HistoryAccordingToAliens”

For even more funny television quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

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