26 Funny under quotes

• 

  3 days ago

  Share →: Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

  Commentary:
  That's one way to handle tough conversations—From couch potato to confrontation! 😂🛋️👻

• 

  4 days ago

  Share →: Wanna perform obscene blood rituals under the full moon, or nah?

  Commentary:
  Just your typical Friday night plans, right? 🌕🔮🩸

• 

  5 days ago

  Share →: Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

  Commentary:
  When she says "I know a spot," better hope it's brunch, not rituals! 🌕😂🔮

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

  Commentary:
  That's one way to keep the meeting "snot" too boring! 😂💻👃

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Whatever you ask the Universe for under this post, you will get next week.

  Commentary:
  "Dear Universe, I'd like a lifetime supply of pizza, a unicorn, and maybe just one day where my WiFi doesn’t decide to take a vacation 🤞🍕🦄📡"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

  …

  Commentary:
  "Your honor, I'm not sure who pulled me over… me or the wind! 🌬️⚡️😂"

• 

  4 months ago

  Share →: I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like someone took 'eating your fruits and veggies' a little too literally 🍎🤦‍♂️ Just making sure to get your daily dose of fiber… and adhesive! 🙊😂"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I may have bags under my eyes, but they’re Versace.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs beauty sleep when you can have designer eye bags? 💁‍♀️✨ Going for that high fashion insomnia look! 😂 #VersaceGoals"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: No thanks, social media influencers. I prefer making decisions the old-fashioned way: under the influence of alcohol.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry social media influencers, I trust my decisions to be more vine than online 🍷😄 #CheersToThat"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the spider unknowingly signed up for a tiny adventure in the "under the bed wilderness" 🕷️🏞️. At least it won't be lacking in excitement! Just call your kid's room a natural habitat and you've got yourself a mini ecosystem right there 😂.

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