Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home. Posted on4 hours ago
I’m a total go with the flow kinda person as long as the flow is meticulously scheduled well in advance and there are no mid-flow changes whatsoever. Posted on6 hours ago
“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination. Posted on6 hours ago
Phew, I thought the weather was broken because there was this weird yellow thing in the sky. But all’s well, it’s raining again. Posted on9 hours ago
Since I tolerate gluten and lactose well, I can afford a few intolerances in the interpersonal area. Posted on9 hours ago
The date didn’t go well but she was nice enough to send a PDF of everything I did wrong afterwards. Posted on11 hours ago
If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color. Posted on12 hours ago
You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me. Posted on14 hours ago
Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out. Posted on18 hours ago
Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that. Posted on23 hours ago
Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?” Posted on1 day ago
I used to eat my feelings but now it’s so expensive, I might as well go to therapy. Posted on1 day ago
My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant. Posted on2 days ago
When I write “I hope this email finds you well” I’m referring to the email’s skills in tracking you down. Posted on2 days ago
“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say. Posted on3 days ago
Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting. Posted on4 days ago
My bed wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I had to stay home to take care of it. Posted on4 days ago