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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Keep scrolling, I’ve got nothing.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

You are never too old to achieve your dreams. Prince Charles had to wait 73 years.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Another beautiful day without using sin, tan and cos.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Don’t give up on your dreams. If cauliflower can be pizza and zucchini can be noodles, you too can be anything you want.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,967

Funny Quotes Topics

14,772

Funny Quotes Images

11,967

Updated

4 minutes ago

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3,431

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Trending via Pinterest:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Going viral on Messenger:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Breaking via Facebook:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Trending via Messenger:

None of the parenting books say what to do when your kids start calling you ‘Bruh.’

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I suffer from awesomnia.

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33 Funny while quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,967

Funny Quotes Topics

14,772

Funny Quotes Images

11,967

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Venting to ChatGPT is crazy, y’all turning schizophrenic.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m so sick of TV shows and movies where there are no likable characters. I don’t need to spend an hour with people I hate, I already have my life.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Accidentally punched myself in the face as I was getting dressed this morning, and I have to say, I deserved it.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Presumably, if you had a time machine, you could just kill young adult Hitler. The baby part seems gratuitous.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Just once I’d like my dog to give me a treat.

Just shared via Twitch:

The term “domestic housewife” implies the existence of a feral housewife and that is what I aspire to be.

Just shared via Telegram:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Trending via Slack:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

One minute you’re young and fun, and the next, you’re turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Betrayal is when you’re holding a baby, and they put their arms out for someone else.

Making waves on WeChat:

After Michael Jordan joined a religious order, he was known as Air Friar.

Spotted on YouTube:

Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

Going viral on Pinterest:

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

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