Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

I’m not feeling very worky today.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Five out of six people find Russian Roulette to be a safe activity.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Lost another rap battle by just agreeing with everything the other guy said.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

I trust an insult more than I do a compliment.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Somethіng wrong іn your lіfe? There’s a nap for that.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

You can be having the nicest day and then you have to print something and you know your day is about to fall apart real fast.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Needlenose in HR says we can’t use nicknames anymore.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,527

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Humans are just chaos wrapped in meat, going bananas on caffeine.

Going viral on TikTok:

What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?

Going viral on WeChat:

Welcome to Netflix. We have everything but what you want to watch.

Going viral on YouTube:

The most romantic minds of our time are being subjected to situationships.

Going viral on X:

I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

Shared recently on Instagram:

Probably the worst thing you can do when your wife gives you a disapproving look from across the room for being on your phone is finish typing this.

Trending via Facebook:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Broadcasted on Slack:

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

Humorous text about a playful twist on forehead kisses and secret spots.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Introducing the latest trend in wholesome affection: the forehead glory hole. Because sometimes all you need is a little kiss on the forehead to brighten your day… and maybe a sprinkle of mystery."

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t mean to brag, but I can forget what I’m saying while I’m saying it.

82 shares on WeChat this month:

Meetings are a wonderful way to help your employees take a break from being productive.

54 shares on TikTok this month:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

80 shares on Twitch this month:

Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.

88 shares on X this month:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

62 shares on Slack this month:

(british guy unhooking your bra) All right, what’s all this, then?

50 shares on Telegram this month:

Nothing bad can happen while you’re under a blanket. Just remember that.

89 shares on Instagram this month:

Somewhere on our planet, there is someone who doesn’t care about you at this moment. It could be billions.

20 shares on Discord this month:

Traveling back in time to proudly inform Benjamin Franklin that my stove has wifi.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

All billionaires must submit a list of five things they did for society in the last week or their wealth shall be confiscated.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t understand people who don’t have kids. Imagine having absolutely nobody to blame when you’re late.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Please don’t use fear to manipulate me. Much more effective to use cake.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,742

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

My dad thought Siri would be more helpful finding a lemon ricotta recipe if he used an Italian accent.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

My favorite part of The Godfather is when the guy wakes up and screams because the Mafia has stolen the bottom half of the horse he keeps in his bed.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Nobody views your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

“I’m just a girl!” No, you are a monster.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Shopping is the only exercise I need.

Just landed via X:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“It’s not that deep!” Well, I have a shovel and I enjoy digging for meaning.

Trending via TikTok:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Going viral on WeChat:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

Seen just now on TikTok:

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

Just landed via Threads:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Life is giving me no lemons. It’s throwing watermelons.

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