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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I hope all of you get laid and not laid off this year. Amen.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Seen an ambulance at the hospital. I hope the doctors are okay.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Tell me I’d look good in a potato sack or lose me forever.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

One day you’ll find someone obsessed with you. It’s probably going to be a squirrel.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

629 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,222

Funny Quotes Topics

17,352

Funny Quotes Images

15,222

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,036

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

Shared recently on Threads:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Trending via YouTube:

She was rare, like a shopping cart at the grocery without a wobbly wheel.

Just shared via Twitch:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Trending via X:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Breaking via YouTube:

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

Just shared via Threads:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I hate the sounds you make when you chew.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

For whom the doom scrolls!

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

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I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why do we keep those boxes? Are we secretly hoping to use them as tiny condos for our chargers? 📦📱😂

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Telegram this month:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

72 shares on X this month:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

62 shares on Pinterest this month:

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

15 shares on X this month:

Aging is the worst. I miss the good ol’ days when my pain was strictly emotional.

73 shares on WeChat this month:

Authentic isn’t automatically good. You could be an authentic douchebag.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

Can’t. Too busy saving daylight.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

Having a crush on someone as an adult feels like a humiliation ritual.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

Accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to pull my blanket up, and if that doesn’t accurately describe my life, I don’t know what does.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes my body needs to be punished by Taco Bell.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m optimistic, in a pessimistic way.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The elder Zoomer speaks of the Wii with reverence.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Being flirted with while you’re on the clock feels like a hostage situation.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

629 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,222

Funny Quotes Topics

17,352

Funny Quotes Images

15,222

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,934

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Starting my period on election day because I’m a true patriot who bleeds for this country.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Play the Grindr notification noise at Christmas dinner to see which conservative relatives panickedly check their phone ringer.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Once you’ve been single for a long time, you realize how exhausting relationships can be.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Death by a thousand stupid questions.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Kinda sucks that I actually own a skeleton but don’t get to show anyone until I die.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I want a man to love me so bad his entire family thinks I did witchcraft on him.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

We go together like Drunk and Disorderly.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

My phone just filmed a 2 hour documentary about life inside my purse.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m sorry I said “I look forward to working with you” during our wedding vows.

Spotted on Facebook:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Just landed via TikTok:

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Going bananas on Threads:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Spotted on Facebook:

We need a slur for people who use ChatGPT.

Just shared via Telegram:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Making waves on Twitch:

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

Making waves on YouTube:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

Making waves on YouTube:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

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