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Commentary:
"Looks like the boss (aka YOU) is not feeling so generous with the budget lately 🤷‍♂️ Maybe it's time for a performance review with some self-reflection? 😅💼 #DIYBoss"

afford, cutbacks, employed, employment, financial, financial struggle, hire, humor, i, irony, job, job market, market, me, money, right, self, self employment, self-employed, struggle, thinking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

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2 months ago

apocalypse, end, end times, existential, front-row, front-row seat, getting, humor, joke, satire, seat, times
If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

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2 months ago

back, Christmas, cold, humor, put, season, time, tree, weather
Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

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2 months ago

behavior, digital, digital behavior, feed, humor, judging, mature, maturity, media, non-judgmental, person, scrolling, social, social media
Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

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2 months ago

bed, daily, daily struggle, day, dealing, getting, humor, interaction, introvert, morning, nothing, people, social, social interaction, struggle
I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

0

3 months ago

account, bank, couple, humor, i, joint, joint bank account, kind, know, marriage, money, relationship, sex, want
The reward for doing really good work is more work.

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2 months ago

doing, expectation, good, good work, humor, irony, life, more work, productivity, reward, work, work life

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Twitch this month:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

47 shares on Threads this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

35 shares on Instagram this month:

I had a healthy appendix removed, just to show the other organs that I will not tolerate any bullshit.

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

Good morning to everyone except myself cause I wish I was still asleep.

35 shares on Slack this month:

Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.

29 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t know how to knit, so I made you a tinfoil hat.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

56 shares on Reddit this month:

If my neighbors would just talk a little louder I could follow along with their conversation, but no. Rude.

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

If your cat has ever accidentally fallen into the tub while you were taking bath, you’ve known chaos.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Not a fan of frozen pizza. Too cold, in my opinion.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I know there are bigger problems in the world right now, but I’ve just realized I’ve never seen a baby seagull.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

When someone yells stop, I don’t know if it’s in the name of love, it’s hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Everyone is getting idioter.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Nothing fixes your life the way deactivating Instagram does.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

“I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Spotted on Reddit:

Somethіng wrong іn your lіfe? There’s a nap for that.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Going viral on WeChat:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

Just landed via Facebook:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The gym gives you energy, but you need energy to get to the gym. Feels like a pyramid scheme, if you ask me.

Going viral on X:

At a certain age, all you really want is a good mattress.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

I don’t know what kind of sex makes y’all want a joint bank account, but I ain’t had it yet.

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨