Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Years of personal growth can be unraveled in 2 days at your parents’ house.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

“The only thing standing between you and your dreams is you!” Yeah, have you met me? That’s gonna be a problem.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Fact: cats sit on your lap to dominate you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

Going bananas on Messenger:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

Making waves on Messenger:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

Going viral on YouTube:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

Going viral on TikTok:

I’ve realized about a third of my life is spent trying to ignore the fact that I have to pee.

Trending via Facebook:

I need to stop living by the words “life is short.” It’s hurting my bank account.

Trending via Slack:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed their chest because of their belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Enjoy your 30s, because in your 40s, your first check engine lights come on.

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Witty quote about morning struggles with coffee dependency, humorous and relatable.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Apparently, my coffee can't function without my supervision. ☕️😂 Who knew I had such an essential role in the world of caffeine? #CoffeeAddict"

, , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

15 shares on Pinterest this month:

Adulting is making a phone call, even though you don’t want to.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so society can recalibrate.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

I’d rather be spotted in a strip club than a Subway.

26 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Parent hack: Shut your child’s bedroom door to make your house cleaner.

38 shares on Facebook this month:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

44 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Catching me in person is rare. I move like a ghost.

77 shares on Slack this month:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Turns out I am the autistic one at “movie night,” who thought you’re supposed to actually watch the movie.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

How inappropriate is it to ask a stranger to scratch your back? Need to know ten minutes ago.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody told me that it takes 1-2 business days to put a snow outfit on a toddler.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,710

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Gave my family the wrong address for our beach rental. Hoping to get a couple days in before they find me.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Eatіng іn bed іs much better. Everythіng’s a napkіn.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I would rather lose you than the argument.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Nothing bad can happen while you’re under a blanket. Just remember that.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

My mental health walks make my mental health worse because I live in a shithole.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

When you’re two beers in, and you realize she looks like God.

Breaking via Slack:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Just landed via WeChat:

Accidentally punched myself in the face as I was getting dressed this morning, and I have to say, I deserved it.

Going viral on Messenger:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Live now on Discord:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

Trending via WhatsApp:

“You’re always sleeping,” God forbid a woman wants to be unconscious.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need a soul to have a soulmate.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Seen just now on YouTube:

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

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