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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I love the smell of someone burning their last bridge with me.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

It doesn’t matter how old you are, when it starts thundering and lightning, you go and sit at the window to watch.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you talk on speakerphone in public, everyone around you hates you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,573

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I like that linguists chose the term ‘loan words,’ implying that one day we’ll get them back.

Spotted on Reddit:

It’s so embarrassing when attention seekers feel the need to tell everybody it’s their birthday in, like, every conversation, which, for me, would be today, by the way.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I appreciate the sun for always moving in the sky in a predictable way but I also respect the moon for just kind of doing whatever.

Just landed via X:

I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

Making waves on Slack:

As a dad, you’re required to ask your neighbor “You gonna do mine next?” when you see them raking leaves.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Making waves on Pinterest:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

What a strange day. And it has been for years.

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

3 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Humorous text highlighting AI-generated romance as funnier than real relationships.

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Commentary:
Sounds like your GPU is working overtime in the romance department! 🤖❤️🔥

AI, comparison, girlfriend, hotter, humor, joke, real, relationship, technology

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55 shares on WeChat this month:

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

22 shares on TikTok this month:

Have been dipping my toe into doing Pilates, and let me tell you, women are real sickos.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

I love airports because the rules of society don’t apply. Eat a pizza and have a glass of wine at 7 am while in track pants. Nobody cares.

80 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

80 shares on Discord this month:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

44 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Living la vida taco!

45 shares on Messenger this month:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Due to the humidity, my hair has chosen violence.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Some should judge a little less and look at their lives a little more.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

You have to stay up as needlessly late as possible to make the next day as horrible and hard as possible.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

I suffer from awesomnia.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

At least life has music.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

I really want an emotional support octopus so I can train it to slap people and shoplift.

Trending via Reddit:

Kids these days are soft. I’m pretty sure I died once when I was 7, and my mom made me walk it off.

Just landed via Facebook:

The time I spend, just thinking about food, is kind of embarrassing.

Just shared via Twitch:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Today, I changed a light bulb and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.

Seen just now on X:

Save money by accidentally forgetting your wallet at home. Follow me for more financial tips and tricks.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Even when I look up the slang of today’s kids, I still have no idea what it means.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Sunday is proof that time travel exists, because it was just Friday.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Why would I want a memory pillow? Sleep is where I go to forget.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Even a broken shrimp fries rice twice a day.

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Activity Log ✨

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

I didn’t get the part of the brain that lets you relax, just the one that overthinks.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My AI-generated girlfriend is hotter than your real girlfriend.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

I’ll never tell anyone your secret because that would mean talking to people.

I didn’t get the part of the brain that lets you relax, just the one that overthinks.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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